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2008-05-12T17:58:00.001+01:00

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2007-07-27T09:42:00.000+01:00

The Last Post

At least the last post at Blogger for I have a new blog/site over at Wordpress.

Please update your bookmarks accordingly.

2007-07-04T11:43:00.000+01:00

Upcoming

I've got bored of having a website and a blog, so I'm looking into combining the two. Expect changes in the near future.

2007-07-04T11:18:00.000+01:00

Done, and Done

I don't really talk about the writing and such very often on here, but sometimes it's worth noting certain milestones.

So, I finished the novel. And I think...cautiously...that it's okay. The interesting thing is the routine I managed to settle into in order to get the last of it done.

I'd wake up, get out of bed (quietly), go through turn the laptop on for an hour. Then I'd get ready and leave early for work so that I could drop in at a cafe for 30 or 40 minutes more laptop time. Then I'd work til lunchtime whereupon I'd go to a local eaterie and bash out another hour's worth. All of which meant by the time I got home, mentally knackered, I'd already had 2-3 hours writing done during the day and didn't feel like I needed to push myself to do more in the evening as well (although of course, I often did anyway). This made me and those around me happier bunnies all round.

The really interesting thing is that now I've got this routine established I don't seem to be able to break it. So, I'm not going to. The cafes of Glasgow will not go bust at the loss of business from the beardy guy with the laptop and the headphones.

And this is a decent opportunity to give thanks to the following establishments which have been chief amongst those that fed me well and shown genuine interest in how the book has progressed: Bella Italia (Hope St), Di Maggios (Royal Exchange Square), Oko Express (Queen Street), The Rhodderick Dhu and Bar Sporta (Waterloo Street) and all of the Cafe Neros in the area.

Also, if you're looking for writing music that blocks out ambient yakking but still allows you to concentrate, I heartily recommend Explosions In The Sky's "All Of A Sudden I Miss Everyone".

2007-06-13T11:51:00.000+01:00

Performance/Face

So, I’ve been thinking about performance lately. Specifically I feel the indie circuit too often misses out on the theatricality and mystique that sometimes goes hand in hand with music. Don’t get me wrong I like going to see music for music’s sake, and I prefer to watch musicians without pretensions – it’s never good seeing unsigned acts who are pumped up with self-importance and acting like total cocks. But sometimes, you hanker for a bit more from a band than stylish haircuts and disaffected indie stances.And it seems I’m not alone.

It was refreshing to find myself at a gig at the Note on Saturday that fit squarely into the resurgent fringe genre they’re calling nu masque. Four acts whose power of performance relies at least in part on the creation of a persona that acts both as a wall and a window that alternately separates the audience from the performers and allows a carefully controlled glimpse into the world of their music.

Take Metal Petal, for example. The first band on the bill took the ‘mask’ element literally. Wild eyes staring out from moulded plastic and troglodytic stomping around combined with their engrossingly uncomfortable sonic output, all mutters and shouts and deep reverb, to create an experience akin to exploratory caving. In the stark, stuttering lamplight of a single strobe, guitars jangled and thrashed and echoed off the walls, keyboards washed in and out like black surf, and drum breaks promising order and pattern led you down dangerous blind alleys, only to pitch you up at the feet of a quartet of deeply unsettling glam morlocks. It wasn’t until well into their performance that I was surprised on realising that I knew three of the musicians, and I thought, “Now, that’s nu masque. Right there.”

Switch that on it’s head. Swap devils for an angel, and you have Miss Leggy Pee. A clever lipsynching act that entertains in spades. The antedote to the previous act’s dark madness, her sharp comedic interpretations of Peggy Lee’s greatest lightened the atmosphere with a sassy smile and sparkle-lashed wink. Not to mention her unconventional use of puppets. This is variety, this is burlesque. Bowie and Kemp and Bowery, and all the original maskcore pioneers would have approved.

You’ve been reading my blog long enough, you must be aware of Scunner and the Glasgow Glambangers by now. These are two acts who have been taking nu masque with their sugar puffs for years. It’s in the essence of what they do. The Glambangers describe themselves as “Gender bending glitter revivalists” and that’s them to a tee, from the thump of their glam-infused drumbox to the stomp of singer Paxton’s knee-high boots. The blurring of gender lines was a pillar of the old maskcore manifesto, and the Glambangers bring that home with a performance that is impossible to ignore.

And Scunner. The puppeteer and the engineer, along with their occasional friends. Paul Puppet arrived on the red-lit stage looking a bit like a publicity-shy Freddy Krueger, the space between the collar of his black shirt and the brim of his black fedora filled with a Burtonesque stocking mask of orange and black stripes. This striking effect was enhanced when he launched into album favourite, Zebra Grove, a dehumanised, angular halloween scarecrow bringing a menacing edge to the song. It was almost a relief when the mask was dispensed with a couple of numbers later, to reveal Puppet’s traditional make-up of comparatively friendly zig-zags and spangles.

An evening of characters then, each of them – the Petals, Leggy, Paxton and Puppet – creating a face to embellish their sounds, to challenge and engage the audience.

I liked it. A lot.

Spin forward a few nights. I’m still mulling over the nu masque thing, but the last place on earth I expected to encounter it was Andy Miller’s acoustic night at Tchai Ovna. Andy’s a technically astonishing guitar player who regularly fills the tea shop with eerie and shiveringly beautiful mellow sounds, but on stage he’s just himself. A very nice bloke playing a guitar. His guest for the evening, on the other hand, was a whole different kettle of bananas. Google ‘Uni And Her Ukelele’ and you’ll see what I mean. This utterly charming lady from San Franciso came on in a whirl of glitter and frills. You couldn’t take your eyes of her, the little body flicks that punctuated her playing, her expressive face, wide eyed and with a mouth that sang smiles. First impression was: ‘yeah, nu masque is global already’, but as her set progressed, and from talking to her afterwards, I began to suspect that this is no mask for Uni – she is actually as effervescently kooky off stage as on.

And it brings me back full circle to what it is you want from a performer. Yeah, sometimes you want more than music. You want spectacle, something weird, something wonderful to watch that complements, enhances the experience. A bit of stagecraft and performance is just the ticket. Unless you’re lucky enough to be watching one of those naturally unique people. People like Uni And Her Ukelele. But they’re special.

2007-05-14T10:18:00.000+01:00

Out!

So, maybe it's the weather or maybe it's the clocks going forward or maybe just because it's May, but all of a sudden good people are putting on good things to go and see. In the last two weeks we've seen a shitload of good music, for very little outlay.

It all started two Saturdays ago with the Littlest Album 3 launch at The Note, and seemed to steam roll from there. There's too much to go into detail, but here are the highlights:

Tuesday 2nd - the ever-entertaining Scunner and The Glasgow Glambangers at Bloc.
Thursday 4th - Super Puny Humans (author Alan Bissett reading along to the music of Y'All Is Fantasy Island and Zoey Van Goey) at Oran Mor.
Saturday 5th - Popup Films' Music and Moving Image at Oran Mor. Five bands interspersed with showings of experimental films. The films were interesting, and the pick of the acts were A Band Called Quinn and Isa And The Filthy Tongues.
Sunday 6th - Boudica's Ball at Oran Mor. A six act bill featuring female-fronted talent (that could have been better phrased I think). Best for me were Lou Hickey and a soaring set by organiser Colette McKendrick.
Wednesday 9th - WordDogs at The Note. No music this time, but plenty of good stories and the entertainment was top notch. Great to see some old favourites reading new material, including the car-crash punning of Gavin Inglis' "Springheeled Jock" [spoiiiiing!], and to hear readers I've not heard before, like Martin Belk.
Thursday 10th - the last of eight T-break heats, at Tut's. Six bands given 20 minutes each to impress enough to grab a slot at T In The Park. Some great stuff going on here, interesting and varied. Top of my pile were the lush and majestic Miyagi, with honourable mentions to the spikily energetic Miss The Occupier and totally madcap Cider Spiders. I'd like to see more of the Sorren MacLean band too.
Saturday 12th - not an entertainment as such, but our friends Phil, Janie and VV held a party to wave goodbye to the West End. Lots of good craic there, but we couldn't last the pace, ending up plonking ourselves on the sofa with pizza, wine and Eurovision.

What do you think we are, party animals?

And that's it. Have a relatively quiet schedule lined up for the forseeable. Which is a good thing, all things considered.

2007-05-02T11:09:00.000+01:00

Monkey Music

Things that have pleased me no end this week.

1/ The Littlest Album launch at the 13th Note. A very eclectic collection of musicians marshalled and organised by Adam from The Plimptons. Some great music, most especially from Only Joe Kane, and we got to play a loud set including a new song. So we all went home happy.

Best of all though is the disk itself. Man, when we first picked up instruments and got a band together in the early 80s, we assumed that if and when we made it the product with our name on it that people would be buying would be vinyl LPs. We dreamed of spinning black plastic encoded with our songs. And I guess that never leaves you. So, cut to 25 years later, and the dream is a reality. The Littlest Album is a thing of beauty. Not just Adam's idiosyncratic, iconic and instantly recognisable artwork and design, but the shiny black vinyl itself. And the best of it is - since I don't own a record player, it'll never get scratched.

2/ Passing it on. No not the lurgie of which both us have been deeply enamoured the last couple of weeks, but ideas, music, creativity. Last night we took our good selves out to catch Scunner and the GlamBangers at Bloc. It's been way too long since we last saw these guys, and had a thoroughly entertaining night (hey, giving noisy plastic toys to the audience is a stroke of genius). And of course the best thing is getting to hear new songs. I particularly enjoyed Scunner's "Cake and Fun" and a brilliant wee song that I believe is called "Monkey In The Looking Glass", which started life as an extrapolation of our song "Spidermonkey" during the Pass The Baton night we did for OxJam last year. I love it when stuff like that happens.

3/ Fitbaw. Got tickets for the UEFA Cup Final. Go me!

4/ The weather's been great, and it lessened the severe disappointment on Sunday of being turned away from Duncan's Ballads Of The Book reading at the Tramway.

5/ Logorrhea : Good Words Make Good Stories is out! I can't wait to get my copy and read, read, read. You should too. Go buy it!

2007-04-19T14:00:00.000+01:00

One Of Those Things That Brightens Up Yer Life

I hear they call him the new Maradonna...

Don't know what they call this guy though...

2007-04-10T11:06:00.000+01:00

Not a ConReport

I've always thought that if you do Eastercon right you should emerge on the other side with very little you can remember to tell people about, just a sort of warm, fuzzy, drained feeling like you've been on a week-long stag-do with a happy-go-lucky bunch of psychic vampires. So, considering that I feel I pretty much did Eastercon (in Chester) right this year, I won't be doing a report. I know these days people tend to blog on the spot, but c'mon for me that gets in the way of the slow and enjoyable process of Achieving Horizontal as the weekend progresses.

But if you're interested here's what I do remember:
- I drank some beer (and a small quantity of strange Thai whisky and nasty raspberry vodka, although not at the same time)
- I ate some delicious food (particularly of the Thai variety)
- I toured the Ye Olde Disneyfest of the old town a couple of times
- I talked to many wonderful people
- and I got inspired.

This last point is very important. I usually find the interaction with other writers and the like at Eastercon an inspiring experience, a resetting of personal goals and receiving the energy to go and achieve them. Often - tired though I undoubtedly will be - I head up the road brimming with ideas and twitching to get back to the laptop. I love this aspect of it, but this year I really felt that I needed it, and am exceedingly grateful for the inspirational influx that came from talking to my agent and my friends and people I didn't know, but do now; from seeing people I admire do well; from seeing the last copy of my collection being sold; from being asked to contribute to a forthcoming anthology; from even being asked to sign a copy of the very first anthology I was in. And if people ask why I go to Eastercon every year - even on a year like this when the event that took place was a, necessarily scaled-back and yet more expensive, replacement for the cancelled original, resulting of many familiar faces not making the trip down from Glasgow and other places - that's why.

Thank gawd for Eastercon.

2007-03-21T23:36:00.000Z

Perserverence Makes Prizes

Just heard that Tamar Yellin's "The Genizah At The House Of Shepher" has won the Sami Rohr Prize for Jewish Literature.

Couldn't have happened to a nicer, or more dedicated, person. The book was a long time in the making, but it just shows you what you can do when you perservere.

I'm so excited for her I don't think I'll sleep tonight.

Well done, T!

2007-03-21T11:17:00.000Z

E-books are beginning to tempt me

And that's something I never thought I'd say. Generally I haven't traditionally enjoyed reading from a screen, but book reader displays are getting higher and higher in resolution, and I have a feeling it won't be so very long before publishers are going to be faced with a pretty persuasive commercial and environmental argument that is going question the viability of traditional paper books.

That's a scenario that gives me the heebies. I love the physicality of books, the feel of the pages, the smell of the paper, the design of the whole package from cover art to typeface. Always have done. Physical books are things that I just want to have, and the fact that I've been dragging my heels over getting those five crates down to the charity shop to complete the literature side of our declutter hasn't gone unremarked. When I was a kid I always wanted a library in my house, a room lined floor to ceiling with books, even on the door. I know now that it's not going to happen. It's just not practical in a flat in Glasgow - but more than that, along with the rest of the world, I sense that I'm moving away from the physical book.

Cory Doctorow's article in the recent issue of Locus put this in a kind of perspective. He's right, much though I protest to not liking reading from a screen, I do it for hours every day. But for my non-work reading I don't do it sitting at my desk: I do it on the bus, on the train, sometimes (if it's really good story) walking down the street; I do it curled up in unnatural positions on the sofa, I do it in bed, and I do it a lot in the bath (which is, a real issue - I'm usually very careful, but splashes do occur and I've (only) once actually dropped a paperback in the water, and there's an obvious difference between having to shell out another £6.99 for a pb and buying a new reader and suffering mild electric shock) All that said, as soon as they produce an affordable device that fits into my preferred leisure reading model, I think I'll likely make the switch.

It's a way off yet, though. I love technology, and living in a world that offers you something new every two or three years, but I'm a second wave adopter. I'm usually skeptical of new technologies until I can see how they'll fit the way I want to use them, and then I go for them big time. This is related to a natural cautiousness on my part, but it's got a couple of advantages. The first is that I don't own anything as gloriously daft as laser disk player, but the bigger advantage is that new gizmos usually have to have the corners buffed off them by the general public before the gap between what the marketeers think people are going to want from a device and what people will actually use it for narrows to the point where you actually get something that's useful.

Part of me's looking forward to it greatly. Moving to MP3s for my music has revolutionalised my life. Having a device that does the same for my book collection will be amazing.

Giving up on my library though, it's like giving up on a dream.

2007-03-13T13:28:00.000Z

Interzone is 25

With the publication of its latest issue (in the shops now!), Interzone magazine is officially 25 years old. I've been reading it for at least 80% of that time and over the years it has introduced me to an uncountable list of fantastic writers that have enriched my life. I've eulogised about the mag before, and there's no need to do so again in detail, but:

1/ Interzone started me writing (and has yet to find a way of stopping me).
2/ Interzone has for a long time now been the keystone of British genre fiction; its editors have an unerring eye for new talent that quickly become household names.
3/ Interzone 209 (out now! buy it!) features an interview between myself and Mr Duncan, plus a new Book Of All Hours story by Mr Duncan, PLUS new stories by M John Harrison, Gwyneth Jones, Alastair Reynolds, Jamie Barras and Daniel Kaysen.

How is it possible you've finished reading this and not gone out and bought the thing, or better still ordered a subscription!

2007-03-02T08:22:00.000Z

Sort of Mellow

That's the way I'm feeling today. It might be because I've taken an impromptu day off to get some writing done, or it might be the music I'm listening to at the moment.

So, a coupla recommendations for you.

1/ Being launched on Monday, The Ballads Of The Book. A rather exciting arts council funded project produced by Chemikal Underground that has seen songwriting collaborations been some of Scotland's most interesting writers and independent musicians. Not sure exactly why the combination of prose writers with songwriters should be considered such a groundbreaking move, myself, but there you go, certainly the results are very impressive indeed. And they include a marvelous effort that combines the talents of Aereogramme with our very own Mr Duncan of this parish.

Order it now.

2/ Had a bit of a CD splurge at Fopp and Avalanche last week and came across a few gems, including recent work from Aimee Mann, Barenaked Ladies, The Feeling. The Plimpton's new album Pomp is high energy madcap entertainment from end to end. And the absolute star for me is The Spell Of The Trembling Earth by The Porch Song Anthology. It's a superb collection of low key murder ballads and appalachianesque country folk. The singing is beautiful and the playing matches it. Gorgeous stuff.

2007-02-13T12:18:00.000Z

A Rare, But Amusing, Conflation Of Interests

We're just back from a couple of days in Birmingham being astonishingly-well entertained by the incredibly talented folk of CandyBox. Look, if you live in the area - or even if you don't - get yourself some tickets for their next show on April 1st. Even if (for whatever reason) you're not piqued by the notion of beautiful ladies burlesquing, the house band, Palookaville, and resident chanteuse, Imelda Mae, are more than worth the price of admission alone.

Anyway, so, checking the BBC news I came across this story, which somehow managed to entangle a boyhood heavy metal hero and my football team.

Just as well it wasn't Biff Byford though, eh?

2007-01-26T10:15:00.000Z

It's a Book? A Film? And a Song?

So, it's been a busy old week that's hardly seen me in the house. I don't normally like having so much stuff happening at once, but sometimes it's just unavoidable.

So, what've we had?

Monday : Band rehearsal ahead of the year's first gig later in the week. Blasted through the set first time with the energy of an erupting volcano...and left ourselves no juice for the second, decidedly limp run through. Left confident, however, that we'll put in a good performance - as long as we only have to play the songs the once.

Also, took delivery of the drum tracks from the previous weekend's recordings (though of course there's been no time to even listen to them yet).

Tuesday : Worked late and then met up with Em for an impromptu trip to GFT. Babel was not the tough, middle-eastern espionage actioner that I had surmised from the very little I knew about it. Instead it was a thoughtful but rather unremittingly grim study of human communication and language. And is heartily recommended...as long as your not expecting Brad Pitt to be rolling around in the dust blowing things up and shooting people.

Wednesday : Word Dogs day. The event went very well. The venue was well chosen and comfortably attended, the stories well selected and all the readers took the theme of Cry Havoc! to their breasts and did an excellent job. Highlights for me were Eliza Chan's piece of perplexed Austinian outrage, Rich Mosses' sleep deprived slice of contemporary bravura, and the ever entertaining Gav Inglis' tale of retail hell. And then there was Al... his reduced, prosified reworking of his now infamous 43 verse sea shanty was a veritable, joyful broadside of a performance. It was a red-lit Captain Jack Flash dolled up in red and black punk gear, patched with the Jolly Roger even, ranting in our faces like a force-ten and leering like the Pink Privateer hisself. Brilliant.

Me, I read a section from the novel. People liked the monkeys.

Thursday : Gig night, playing for the Pinup guys at their new Ambulance Station night at the Admiral, which if you happen to be in Glasgow, has a great wee venue downstairs from the main pub bit. These kind of multi-band nights are always a bit of a variety show, and this one was no exception. We followed the full-on power fuzz of Conscious Pilot, and after us the assembled audience got to chill and dance a bit to the happy, happy twee-indie (twindie? tweedie?**) songs of Mia Beane And The Asthmatic Scene. Afterwards we kicked back with a few drinks and enjoyed the unbelievable - and occasionally unmentionable - depths of Mr Paul Puppet's CD collection.

[** This sparked a conversational game. Assuming that any musical style can be performed in a twee manner, a whole new vista of sub-genre names are suddenly available to the music journalist: twee-folk might be "tweek", twee-pop is surely "twop", then we have "twazz", "twock", "twing", "twelectronica". And best of all improvised jazz singing performed with fey vocal delivery MUST be twee-scat. This I want to hear - not just for the juvenile appropriation of the name, yunnerstand - I really want to hear it.]

And there's more.

Tonight's extravaganza is a trip to the Academy to see Ben Folds abuse his piano. I'll watch, listen - possibly marvel even - and be grateful that I don't have to do anything but be there.

2007-01-17T10:14:00.000Z

Word, Dog.

A date for yer diary, should you be interested in this sort of thing.

Wednesday 24th January, 8.30pm
13th Note, King Street, Glasgow
Word Dogs : Cry Havoc! An explosive evening of high-octane fiction readings on the subject of conflict, war, ruckuses, barneys and gentlemen's boxing brought to you by Word Dogs, the exhibitionist arm of GSFWC.

The format will be something like:
1/ grab a seat and a beer
2/ listen to two or three entertaining stories
3/ grab another beer and have a chat
4/ more stories
5/ more beer... and so on until closing time.

Easy, fun and quieter than Murnie. Come on down.

If noise is more your thing, however, I should also take the opportunity to point out that Murnie are rolling out the loudness guns the following night for Pin-up's Ambulance Station at the Admiral in Waterloo Street.

Aye well, at least it's never dull round here.

2007-01-15T15:50:00.000Z

Beggars Belief

How is it even possible that anyone thought that this was a good idea, let alone neglected to take medical advice about it. Me, though, I don't really blame the idiot radio station, or the half-wits that entered the competition. I blame the Nintendo marketing geniuses that came up with product name in the first place.

People are puerile. That's just the way it is.

Nervous as all hell about what the general public will make of the second generation version undoubtedly in development as we speak.

The dreaded Puu.

2007-01-07T19:59:00.000Z

It's a Swizz!

So, that's the holiday break almost over. I've got a couple of days yet til I go back to work, but as one of them will be spent having root treatment at the dentist, it doesn't really count. As you'll have gathered it's not been the most healthy or productive of breaks, but even so it rather surprises me to find that I'm actually looking forward to going back to work.

Meantime if anyone with kids is looking for something to do in the Newcastle area, we can heartily recommend Seven Stories which is a rather neat bookshop cum story telling centre.

Loads of fun.

2006-12-28T18:46:00.000Z

Humbug!

How's your Christmas going? Probably better than mine, I imagine. We had a cracking couple of days out at my folks' place, but since the minute we got home I've been laid flat out with a bastard of a lurgie. All those marvellous Xmas goodies? No appetite and couldn't taste them even if I did.

Not even humbugs.

Enjoy yerselves.

2006-12-19T09:58:00.000Z

Late Entry In The Race For The Top Of The Christmas Charts

Nae luck, Leona. Here comes Scunner, Bearing Gifts.

And here's the live performance.

Pardon my idiom, but I fucking love these guys.

2006-12-13T16:03:00.000Z

Whether the weather

I don't normally complain about the weather. Living in Glasgow there's no point, it's one of the givens of life. Every day you get weather. Sometimes three or four sorts. And I don't normally get the November blues either, when the nights fair draw in and you go to work in the dark and you come home in the dark. Generally speaking, I'm not a SAD type of individual.

But the conditions today are simply evil. We're, what, a week away from the solstice and I don't think I could honestly say we've had daylight the whole day. A bit less dark perhaps, a lightening of the sky from black to heavy grey, but that's as optimistic as it got. And the rain has been lashing without cease and the wind has been blustering back and forth tirelessly, screaming through the window glass, rattling them in their frames.

And in a couple of hours' time I'm going to be out playing football in it.

Baws!

2006-12-08T09:59:00.000Z

Remix

It seems the video mash-up (cf the marvelous ThriftShop XL) has evolved a level of sophistication. Re-cut movie trailers that completely change the meaning of the film.

I was much taken by the recent BoingBoing entry on Mary Poppins as a horror movie, but my favourite is probably this one.

If anyone knows of any more of these, please point me in their direction.

Edit
Thanks to Rich for these.
Not seen Brokeback Mountain, but it seems to have struck a chord. This one, I liked though.

And... actually I see there are tons of these. I'll have to be selective. If I come across any really good ones, I'll share.

2006-12-07T10:53:00.000Z

Rarities

There's something that happens so occasionally in my world that you almost forget about it entirely. Almost. Not quite. Because, like a cosmological event, when it does come round it leaves a long blazing mark in the memory, and a hook of hope that you'll see it, one day, again.

What am I talking about?

The new issue of Crimewave just landed.

If you don't know about Crimewave. Here are seven statements:

I have never read an issue of Crimewave that did not make me seethe with jealousy
It's produced by TTAPress - the people who bring you Interzone and TTA/BlackStatic - and it surpasses both magazines by miles
It's the best Crime fiction magazine there is
It's not a Crime magazine. The stories are about "crime" only in the way that life is largely about crime; the transgressions people commit against each other in the course of living their lives. The stories are about life
The new issue is one of the most beautiful examples of book production I've ever seen. But then I always say that
Crimewave is the only magazine I buy *knowing* that I'm not going to be disappointed.

Aye, a rarity, right enough.

2006-12-07T10:21:00.000Z

Pirate Memory Games

Warning: this post contains half-baked and undigested ideas. Feel free to argue with or ignore as you will.

So, it seems the whole world is writing Pirate stories. I know of at least five GSFWC members who claim to have signed up for passage (Mr Duncan has of course already completed his, plus landed a leviathan of a sea shanty into the bargain; and I've read one other which is just brilliant), and of plenty of others further afield who are in the process of finding their sea legs and heaving to as well. So, it's probably a good job that the world and his wife are getting ready to publish all these pirate stories that are going to be floating around pretty soon like so much storm-wrecked flotsam...well, I know of at least two or three publishing venues dedicating themselves to nefarious sea-going adventures, and that seems like a lot - they won't be enough, and pirate stories will be washing ashore in all sorts of strange places over the next couple of years, but that's the nature of capturing the general writerly imagination.

Which is all good, because, of course, I too have a pirate tale to tell, and I think I have a pretty unique angle on it. But it's got me wondering: what do people really want from a pirate story? I'm sure I'm not going to be the only one who's first reaction to the brief: "Write a story with pirates in..." was, "Great! What can I do with this? How can I make it different?" Not by a long chalk. Because, yes, it's great that pirates are "in" right now. Pirates are fun (we have annual talk-like-a-pirate day fer chrissakes!), they're cool, they're rock and roll, and we have a lot to thank Mr Depp and his shipmates for in raising their profile. And I, like everyone else I know probably, amn't going to settle for a run of the mill seafaring adventure story. I mean how many opportunities to you get to write something like this? No, it has to be special...

I'm really looking forward to what variations all these cool writers will inevitably come up with on the theme, but I just hope that people are not going to be disappointed when they a buy a book of Pirate Stories and they find all this neat, out-there stuff instead of twenty-two Pirates of The Caribbean rip-offs. Are they, in the words of Little Britain's Mr Mann, going to be looking for something "a bit more piratey"?

See, I enjoyed the PoTC movies (yea, even in their disneyfication), and their antecedent, the marvelous Burt Lancaster vehicle, The Crimson Pirate is one of my favourite movies, but the more I think about this, what interests me is the yawning gulf that lies between the colourful, wisecracking, slightly-dangerous-but-that-just-makes-them-more-sexually-attractive jack tars of popular conception and Real Uncompromising Bastard Pirates.

You can tell I've not really thought this through, so I'll give it a rest for now, but it'll likely form the basis of my story, which otherwise is going to be clothed in the guise of an MGM Pirate musical.

Because when it comes down to it, at the end of the day, Pirates are fun after all.

2006-11-08T15:12:00.000Z

Like I've Never Been Away

But I have been, see? It's just that between the close of the working day one Tuesday evening and rolling back into the office another Wednesday morning, the last week at World Fantasy seems like such a seamless splice into my life that already I'm wondering if it happened or if it was just some half-remembered very weird late night movie. This is perhaps no more than an example of the way my brain works on jetlag. Probably.

So, obviously I'm in no shape to deliver anything approaching a coherent con report, nevertheless I'll do my best to throw down what impressions remain.

Well, I was on a panel about "regional fantasy", which went okay. The other panelists (Jay Lake (American), Fiona McIntosh (Australian) and Holly Phillips (Canadian)) were all charming, witty and interesting. And we hardly ever deviated from the subject.

I did a reading too. The Gubbins (which will be familiar to members of the British Fantasy Society and people who attended the Word Dogs reading at the Ingram bar prior to Eastercon) went down well. I also read a passage from the novel, about which I was pretty nervous; but no-one fell asleep and no-one attempted to assault me, so I guess that went down all right too.

Didn't win an award for Nova Scotia, but then I didn't expect to. Was a little surprised that the Fair Folk book won the category ahead of Adventure and Polyphony 5, but I have it home with me and will be able to make my own mind up about it at some point.

Came home with LOTS of books *sigh*.

But...friends. First and foremost, WFC is about friends. Old ones and new ones. If I try to mention everyone I met I'll end up forgetting people, so I won't, but I enjoyed everyone's company. Here, however, are some random nuggets that will mean little to anyone but those involved:
- Jeff and Ann: "velvety and curvy". You two are always a joy.
- Robert: thanks for putting up with four days of unintentional snubbing and showing me your old haunts on the last day. I hope the dapper marionette gets the exposure he deserves sooner rather than later.
- Nancy and Alex: an excellent reminiscence of the Milford days, especially the excitement of the Southern-cooked meal with Robert, Deborah (hi, at last!), Rick and Therese and all the chat afterward.
- Chris and Allison: Mr Dunc told me you were a pair of diamonds, and he *never* lies. Thanks for looking after him after his little incident.
- JK: sorry (again) for the book gaffe, you're a gentleman through and through.
- Gavin, Kelly, Kristin, Alan: good to see all of you again, and glad I was able to take your money in exchange for my old rope. Hope you enjoy it.
- Caselberg: [insert insult here], then deliver it to yourself, but with fondness.
- Darren: enjoyed our late night chat, man. Didn't realise how intense it got. Thankfully the arrival of the delightful Ms Sparks jollied us up some. Hope you found that party.
- Holly: good to meet you m'dear. I suspect I'll be commenting (in a very positive sense) about your collection which I read half of on the plane home. Have a whisky for me next time you get together to do the music thing.
- and Al: it was a pleasure and an honour to be flying the gsfwc standard by your side during the awards. Hope your head heals quickly. Ya numpty.

And then I came home, and now I'm here and trying to resist checking out how much an air fare to Saratoga Springs is. Not that I'm thinking of going, of course.